Posted by Joel
Sat, 30 Sep 2006 21:47:00 GMT
This was a good week for work and pretty enjoyable. Last night DJ Krush played and I was going to go but I ended up staying in. This is mainly because despite leaving work at 6:30, and the show starting at 9 and being within reasonable walking distance from my apartment, a combination of the hour commute, getting gas, buying a new tape adapter from Fry's because my old one died for no reason (this is my fourth), and spending 45 minutes parking brought me home around 9:10, so I decided to say fuck it. Anyway I just watched some TV (Frasier, Law & Order, Poltergeist III), and then played WoW for a few hours and that was fun.
My roommate is having his 70s party bus thing tonight which I guess I'm obligated to go to. But I want to use my Saturday for good and not evil today... I might walk down to the Embarcadero which somehow I've never really visited. I really need to start my working out again, although I've been eating marginally better this last week.
So things seem OK lately, no real crises of mind. I came across a new philosophical impasse in the car. For a while, I've found myself to be generally accepting of determinism, and utilitarianism. I'd say I'm a nihilist, but I do believe in objective truth and secular ethics. But I want to reconcile this lack of choice and therefore responsibility through what I see as inevitable actions with my flirtation with libertarianism (if not ethical egoism), which I'm not sure is possible, and I might have to reject it. Still, I think I've found a way, and just need to explore it more. I'd like nothing more to logically justify egoism at this point because I find it empowering. Still, I will always side with the truth, no matter how much it might suck. The commute gives me lots of time to think on matters such as this which is why I don't mind it at all -- it's the parking, which takes over your mind, that bothers me.
We all had sushi yesterday at work which was a fun experience. We've also hired two new coworkers since I've last made mention of it, Hunter and Nicole, since Zurb is doing so well. Our team is just so awesome and I can't express enough how much I find work both productive and fun.
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Posted by Joel
Tue, 26 Sep 2006 01:12:43 GMT
Saturday I went to see Rob DJ a show at Club 222. I'd never been to Club 222 before but it is a bar in the Tenderloin at Hyde and Turk. Their shady location is kind of their gimmick. They sell pizza, the flavors named "Hyde" and "Turk."
It's a great place though. Very hip crowd. Rob was DJing so I went up and shook his hand. I knew I'd be by myself anyway. So I went to the bar and drank some PBRs and ordered their Hyde pizza, which has goat cheese. It was really good!
I mainly just sat there and drank and listened and ate. Occasionally someone would chat with me a short bit. Eventually I went down to the dance area and stood and watched.
Rob finished DJing and then a band played called Uphonic. It was two guys singing over electronic music. I thought Rob would be done then but he was doing technical stuff for them for their show. However I'd had a few drinks and I enjoyed their music. It reminded me of Vitalic somewhat.
Afterwards I bought their CD and introduced myself to them. I spent some time with Rob and his friends before deciding to leave, since it had been a couple hours.
I ended up walking home because I couldn't catch a taxi on the way but it was a nice walk. I had a euphoric buzz of sorts going and felt genuinely happy.
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Posted by Joel
Sat, 23 Sep 2006 21:59:00 GMT
So I decided to go to the show even though I was going by myself. Unfortunately I let myself get held back a bit at work and didn't leave until 6. Got to the city around 7:10, spent a half hour looking for parking before giving up and calling Paul and Michael and asking if I could stay at their place. Eventually got ahold of them and they agreed, so I drove over the bridge and hit east bay traffic. The show started at 8:00 and DJ Shadow was the opening act and the only one I cared about, really. But the time I found a place to park (the first few pay lots I tried were full), got my ticket and walked inside, it was 9 o'clock and they were taking down all of DJ Shadow's stuff. I didn't even get to see him.
I watched Massive Attack, just standing there by myself. Everyone else was with friends, drinking beers, getting high. I just stood there, arms folded because it was kind of chilly. About 45 minutes in I left because I was bored of it. I drove away and felt a chilling loneliness, driving through the Berkeley streets at night, and felt I was trapped and could never get out of this state I'm in. I attempted to analyze again if this was an intrinsic personality flaw that made me unattractive to people, or just that I had bad luck in the people I meet. And if it's the latter, what percentage of people are actually worth a damn, and how can I help determine which ones which seem good will end up stabbing me in the back. Regardless, I can't say I'm unwilling to try with people, because I still do, and I will probably continue to be betrayed. For a while I felt nearly suicidal.
Went to Paul's and hung out with them and immediately felt better. We watched American History X, which we'd all already seen, and they mocked my choice of "fufu" beers (IPAs) while they drank Coronas and Bud Lite, ever populist.
Woke up in the morning and dragged Paul out to get some breakfast, we just went to a bakery nearby and he didn't even eat anything. He and his housemates talked some politics which I mainly observed while I fidgeted with various things around their house. Spent about an hour in traffic on the way back to SF, managed to find a spot, KALX was playing boring sports talk the whole time because a Cal game is on, so it was an intolerable wait in a hot car. Now I'm here, and for once I actually have plans of some sort, which I may or may not do.
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Posted by Joel
Wed, 20 Sep 2006 04:50:00 GMT
I just missed Ratatat! Coming soon: I miss Massive Attack & DJ Shadow, despite having planned to go far in advance!
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Posted by Joel
Tue, 19 Sep 2006 23:28:00 GMT
Ok new record for not posting. I just don't like posting as much when things aren't kind of active and interesting. You can probably assume that if I'm not posting, it's because I'm living the regular boring routine and doing nothing worthwhile.
This weekend was basically just playing WoW on my warlock, doing level 29 pvp, which was a lot of fun. It's fun to play a class that just kicks ass. Don't worry about my WoW playing though because really I only play it on the weekends to help curb how lonely I can get.
I wasn't as neurotic about wasting my weekend sitting at a computer this weekend. I mean, I spend nearly all my time at a computer besides the time I'm sleeping. And even then it's usually right next to me. Using the computer right after waking up helps me to avoid going back to sleep in the morning.
Saturday I called Paul but he was seeing a friend in the city I don't really like so I decided not to call back. Sunday though I just mellowed out and felt at peace for a while. People seemed nice and my life seemed content. At first I was looking at myself (for some reason my room has a big mirror which I hate) and around my room and feeling depressed at what I was. But I just went and showered and shaved and put on some of my favorite clothes and told myself none of it is really that important. It's ok to be alone. Somehow things seemed ok after that. I got a few small groceries from the corner store, just some more cereal and some soup. I should note the nearest "corner store" is about five blocks away up and down a hill. I sat on the couch and watched TV and didn't use the computer for a few hours and just relaxed. Eventually I got bored and went back on the internet.
I haven't gone to work out in over a week now. I'm going to try to do it tonight, we'll see.
My roommate wants me to go on a "70s party bus" for his birthday. It's not really my style but he's pressuring me into it. I might move in either with Marc or some coworkers because the city means nothing to me anymore besides a commute, higher rent, and parking issues, as I doubt I'll speak to David ever again, so I basically have no friends here.
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Posted by Joel
Thu, 14 Sep 2006 00:57:00 GMT
Monday I was kind of freaking out. The Apple Store called and told me my keyboard was in and that it would take two hours to install while I waited. I got a ticket on the way there for having a late plate registration and it just triggered some neurosis. Anyway I got to the store and they told me that they couldn't do it in two hours after all, in one of those "who told you that?"moments.
I left it overnight and used another Windows laptop on Tuesday. Tuesday wasn't as bad really. I picked up my computer with its new keyboard, and now it's today.
Made some good progress on stuff at work, I think our next feature is going to shape up well, our new storage should be installed tomorrow morning (our disk is at 92% full). Work is the most enjoyable part of my life right now, to the degree I wish I could stay later, but I can't because of parking. I really should move.
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Posted by Joel
Mon, 11 Sep 2006 21:47:12 GMT
Well, this weekend sucked. Friday I just played WoW, nothing exciting. Then I spilled a beer on my computer. Luckily the computer wasn't damaged but the keyboard was. The "S" and "F" keys didn't work. On top of that we had site problems on Saturday so I had to debug them with the broken keyboard, clicking a little software program every time I needed to type "S" or "F". I went to the SF Apple Store and they couldn't even see me about the computer because they had appointments through the entire day. They told me to log in and make an appointment at midnight and try to get in on Sunday.
Instead I went to a nearby Apple Store in a mall. They actually helped me out. The guy saw that I had Japanese enabled and started talking to me in Japanese. I was caught off guard and realized how bad I have gotten at it since I haven't really used it in over two years. So that bummed me out. After trying a few different keyboards they had available, none of them fit right so he ordered me a new one, and will call me when it comes in so I can drive over and have them install it. In the meantime I bought a USB keyboard which I'm using now.
I got back home and spent over an hour looking for a place to park.
Sunday was also terrible, I just played Warcraft, did some reading, and otherwise felt depressed, and stayed up too late. Work is hectic right now. I'm not having a great time and I just don't know what I'm going to do in order to make it so I have fun again. It just seems like I don't have any friends anymore. Everyone is so far away or has become a jerk. I need to move to be at least near one friend because this sucks and I'm sick of living in Chinatown anyway.
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Posted by Joel
Fri, 08 Sep 2006 16:39:00 GMT
Things are pretty predictable lately. I don't mind my routine, though. On the whole, my days are pretty enjoyable. Work, commute, and after hours; can't complain. It's lagom.
I was lapsing into later start times and consequently getting some parking tickets so I'm going the early route again. Trying to be in my car by 7 am every day. This is mainly so I can arrive back into the city by 6pm and still have done a full day's work; at 6pm, parking is very good, and tons of good parking spots require you be out by 7:00 or 7:30 am the next day. So if I keep that schedule well, I never have to worry about parking, and there isn't really much traffic in my commute.
Wednesday I worked out again. I hadn't done it in over a week so I decided to push myself. Before, I used to read a book and ride the bike for a half hour. I would usually burn just under 250 calories. Then last time I made it a goal to make 250. The time after that, I put the book down 10 minutes from the end and just made it all the way to 260 in a half hour. But this time, I didn't read the book at all, made my goal 265 calories as fast as I could do it, and got it done in under 25 minutes!
I've also "levelled up" on curling, now doing reps of 40 lbs instead of 30. It's a good feeling when you get to move up a weight rank.
I want to try to lose a pound a week. Or at least a half pound. Really need to exercise more, though.
At night I've just been having a few beers and chatting with people or watching TV or playing WoW. Weekend is coming up so who knows what I'll do. I'm going to give myself a couple errands to accomplish so I can start chipping away at a backlog that has been growing. Slow and steady.
Ben made me aware of the show with zefrank and you should probably watch that.
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Posted by Joel
Wed, 06 Sep 2006 00:21:43 GMT
OK, it wasn't bad. Friday night I played Warcraft and had fun doing that. Saturday I went to a barbecue in Berkeley with Paul and his many friends and housemates. Lots of people were there, Justin, Michael, Richard, Albert, Sam. I had a good time and their new place is pretty cool. I was glad to see their Soviet Russia flag flying freely upon entrance.
Saturday night I played Warcraft again, more group PvP, just killing people with Ben. Then the next day I drove to SLO to Mom and Julia's.
We went to Tortilla Flats and walked around town a bit and then went back home. I spent nearly all of the next day napping and hanging out with their new kitten. We didn't have readily available Internet, so I started a new forum project just to kill time -- this time tree-based rather than linear. And I think I'm pretty much sick of AJAX forever.
Kind of funny I programmed during most of my Labor Day.
I'm saddened that I missed Burning Man because my friends are all horribly lame but what can I say, I had a pretty good weekend and I need to stop whining.
Oh, and I'm thinking of moving (again).
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